The Correct Way to Create New Year's Resolutions

2022 is coming to a close. Thank God for the first relatively normal year since the pandemic hit. The last 12 months brought me sobriety, a raise at work, and the start of sharing my anxiety journey with all of you. It was a big year for growth in all respects.

My therapist doesn’t like resolutions. She thinks it sets us up for failure. But personally, I love them. I am very goal-oriented and I love chipping away at something bit by bit over time. After setting a goal, you can’t just put it down and expect it to magically manifest. You have to have a plan. Because, if you fail to plan, you plan to fail (I sense this is going to be my 2023 motto).

Creating resolutions is an opportunity to plant a seed of what you want your future to look like, and take the first steps towards positive growth. As soon as December hit this year I began crafting my resolutions. My goals began super broad:

Renee’s 2023 Resolutions: 1. Stay sober 2. Get a new job 3. Pay off student debt

I stared at goals, knowing that I did want to achieve all of those things. But they were too broad and very open to interpretation. For example, I am not going to pay off all of my student debt within a year.

Getting a new job is also a bit vague. I know what I really want is a higher paying job, and one with retirement and health insurance benefits.

The trick is be more specific with your goals that way you can lay a proper foundation. Once I had my broad goals lined out, I expanded upon them and made them more specific. These are my resolutions as they currently stand:

Renee’s 2023 Resolutions: 1. Reach 1 year of sobriety from alcohol 2. Get a higher paying job with benefits in the next 6 months. 3. Pay off $1,500 of interest on my student debt.

I know that I can achieve every single one of those things in the next 365 days, and that makes me feel even more motivated than setting a grand, lofty goal.

I've provided some examples of time oriented, specific, achievable resolutions you can adopt that may improve your mental wellness in the new year:

•Find one new friend that is stable and caring (or devote more time to a friend you already have who is stable and caring) in the next 2 months.

•Tell your clients that you will not answer their emails after 5pm.

•Try to be sober for 3 months.

•Cut coffee out of your morning routine at least 2 days a week.

•Start doing yoga twice a week.

•Try to meditate for 5 minutes a day.

•Buy a journal and write in it once a week.

•Shut your phone off at 8pm every night.

As you come up with your own resolutions, remember to stay specific, keep them within reason, and make sure they are your goals. If you set a resolution that will completely upend your current routine and lifestyle, you are way more likely to give up on it. You need to be patient and slow with life style changes. This is why people go to the gym like crazy every January with new body goals in mind, but burn out and give up by February or March. Go easy on yourself, and if you slowly build a routine (for example, cutting coffee out of your morning for 2 days a week), it will become easier to achieve more progress over time (eventually you’ll be able to go the whole week without coffee).

Without diving into too much detail, this whole approach follows the SMART goals system. SMART stands for Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant, and Time-Bound. If you are interested in learning more about SMART goals, you can read about them here.

What are your New Year’s Resolutions? I would LOVE to hear them and I cannot wait to see what 2023 brings for all of us.

Stay safe out there :)

Xx,

Renee