The Revolutionary Concept of Being “The Fool"

Alright, I need to take a break from all the seriousness. I share a lot of darker details on here, but obviously my life isn’t all gloom and doom. In fact, it’s the exact opposite. But I feel we need more vulnerability out in the world. It is so cathartic when people are genuine; it’s like a breath of fresh air. I’m in the middle of writing a really intense piece, and it’s taking a lot out of me emotionally, but I know it’s going to feel amazing when I finally share it with you all, and I’m really looking forward to it. :)

Life has changed a lot in the last 2 months. Joe and I moved states and both advanced forward in our careers. It’s been a ton of change and adjustment, and even though our lives are changing in positive ways, the growing pains have been real. I was excited but also grieving leaving Ithaca, a place that I had lived for much of my life.

One of my last days in New York my good friend and I decided to do a Tarot card reading. We did a 5-card spread, asking general questions about where my life was headed. As I turned each card over, they forecasted my coming financial and career change, as well as a more serious step into my relationship. I couldn’t help but grin as I turned over my last card – The Fool.

The Fool is a card all about new beginnings– in fact, it’s the first card in the Major Arcana. In Tarot there is a Major and a Minor Arcana. I like to think of them as two different life cycles. The Major Arcana foretells huge life transitions and waypoints, whereas the Minor Arcana describes more mundane events (read more here).

I don’t typically think of the word “fool” as a positive thing. When I hear that word my brain pulls up images of a bumbling, drunken idiot, someone Homer-Simpson-esque. But in the world of Tarot (and perhaps in life), being a fool is quite an exciting thing.

Biddy Tarot, my favorite site for tarot readings, describes this card beautifully, “Now is a time when you need to trust where the Universe is taking you. Take that leap of faith, even if you do not feel 100% ready or equipped for what is coming (who knows what it could be?!). Seriously, what are you waiting for? Do you think you need to have everything mapped out before you can begin? No way! You are ready! If you’ve been watching for a sign, this is it!” (source). … I was blown away after I read that. I feel goosebumps on my arms even now. This idea of jumping in, relinquishing control, has always been something I have struggled with. In my mind the world is a bunch of puzzles, and if I don’t figure them out, I’ll get the short end of the stick. So to be told I need to just let go, surrender, let the wind lead me wherever it wants, is both terrifying and freeing.

I’m reminded of a conversation that Joe and I had when we first started seeing each other. It was your typical gray, cloudy day in Ithaca, NY, and we were going for a walk on the MonkeyRun trail system. When we got to a nice clearing we sat down against a tree stump and looked up at the sky. We were talking about our futures and he suddenly told me that he wanted to be an astronaut someday. I laughed, because he was currently working at Cornell studying mosquitos.

“It’s not a joke,” he told me. “I really am going to do it one day. I’ll figure it out.”

He was so confident and dead-set on his goal, that as outlandish and silly as it sounded, I believed him. He really believed he could do it, so I did, too. I don’t think I had ever been that confident about any of my dreams. I had always settled for what I thought was more realistic.

But that mindset is so defeating. When did we decide to stop believing in ourselves? It’s like learning how to play the trumpet, or french. Some things seem too daunting to even start. A lot of us think “I’m 46, I can’t learn a new instrument or a new language.”

Drawing The Fool was a much needed reminder to trust the process, even if it seems impossible; to chip away at my dreams and take a risk, a plunge. I can confidently say that 2 months later, my life hasn’t collapsed. Everything has worked out pretty beautifully.

We successfully moved states within 2 weeks of finding an apartment, I’ve switched career paths into Marketing (a statement I never thought I would be saying) and am forming loose plans in my mind to go back to school and get a Masters in Public Health. Joe and I may be getting a dog together, we are exploring and making friends in this new city, and are learning more about how to love each other more deeply each and every day. All the things that I was anxious about never came to fruition, all because I just kept taking steps forward, and surrendering to faith. I allowed myself to be The Fool and I believed that anything was possible.

I want to know what you are going through right now – what do you feel uncertain about? What do you feel in your heart? What would a leap of faith look like to you?

A beginner’s mindset is key… let’s all stop pretending we know what’s going on and take a leap. You truly do not have control over the outcome, and who knows? Your life could be great on the other side.

Xx,

Renee.